DEALING WITH DOCTORS . . . what I'm still learning to say

One healing trait from Dr. Spiegel's study (see yesterday's post)  was being assertive with doctors.  I think I'm pretty assertive with them, but it depends on the doctor and on how secure I feel.

I was more assertive with specialists in California because I felt that my primary doctor, whom I trusted completely, had my back.  Now being in Texas still feels new.   I don't feel I have a medical safety net yet, except for the surgeon. 

Sometimes, with a particular doctor, I'm not assertive because I feel it won't do any good.  Maybe I started out by being passive with that doctor.   Or right then I was just overwhelmed. 

Some women have always been discouraged from being assertive.  For instance, my ex-husband tried to make me leave an assertiveness workshop.   Maybe he thought assertive meant aggressive.

I need to remember to say:

Please let me finish.  (Said very politely before I get angrier)

No, it doesn't feel like that.

What else could this be?

I've had this before.

How else could we treat this?

I need to speak.

I was really upset when I learned that the directions were not complete!  How can we communicate so that doesn't happen again?  

Yes, these are in bold type.  They are urgent--urgent enough to practice before we get into the doctor's office. 

I wish you health.

POST - RADIATION NEXT STEP . . . My list for medical oncologist Part 1

Yesterday, I tried again to get an earlier appointment than February for the medical oncologist.  They told me to come in this morning.  Last night, coughing and sore throat started, bad enough so that I dreamed about it.  So I cancelled.

But I had already gone through my questions and worries lists in my computer.

My current  list includes:

Cataracts - already have one, and don't want any more.  How to avoid? Common?
Fuzzy thinking  -  how common?
Tamoxifen side effects - how to avoid
Tamoxifen vs Arimidex  The more I learn about Arimidex, the more I don't want it
Raloxifene  
To soy or not to soy   I suspect it will be Not to soy
Any hope for new drugs this year?

None of the research I've found so far says what percentage of women on Tamoxifen get cataracts or fuzzy thinking or any of the other side effects.  The only percentage I've found is that around 1% will get uterine cancer.

At this point, I've asked for my February 6 appointment to be reinstated.

I want some good news from this doctor, and I want good news for you.